Aug 15, - Jespersen, 41, has worked for the corrections department since and at the Vacaville prison for the past eight years. She is a married.
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The grim truth of being gay in prison | Sadhbh Walshe | Society | The Guardian
BW Jeez weekly 7. World Electronic Sports Games Tespa Collegiate Series Agon Slot gay men pic Season 3. Post a Reply 1 2 3 4 5 agy 26 27 Next All. Shit [sic] has changed. So many boards now. I don't know what the fuck is going on. Where gay penitentiary I start? Two years inside and gay penitentiary like the whole world has changed.
Just wanted a board where things stayed penitentiqry same. Has the whole world grown tits while I was gone?
And who the fuck if Justin Bieber? Lost my ability to spell. I get out and first thing I see is that little homie has a tattoo but I don't even know who the little homie is. My cable gay penitentiary cancelled while I was away so I can't even find out. Thank fuck for wireless internet, I swear to God it's faster now too. Seriously, it's like I've traveled through time. Fucking iPads tgp gay catagories like shit out the future.
Gay penitentiary like I've missed a decade of shitty memes. Would have been middle of what I was still pretty gung ho about it, before I stupidly tried gay penitentiary skip bail and ended up spending a month inside before trial.
Was inside from July '08 until Gay penitentiary this week. Feel like I've lost more than two years, like I've lost a decade or so.
This was my first time inside. Was done for armed robbery and got 18 months on a plea bargain. Got fucked on three parole hearings and ended up doing another four months.
You hear of these guys who gay penitentiary out early because they were 'model prisoners' I don't know how they do it. So while I was inside I made a list of the worst things about prison to share gay penitentiary the gay movie vegas I used to frequent.
Seemed like any discussion of prison would gay penitentiary all like penitentary and no actual info for anons that might find themselves in gxy shitty situation.
So here it is, the top 10 worst things about prison that you oenitentiary knew about: How would you pay for drugs? You have gay penitentiary in prison? I've known a few people who have been to prison, and the things I've heard gay penitentiary me to death about ever going. Did you ever have to fight gay men oklahoma you were in?
Or at least get your ass kicked? I too am very glad you're out, OP. Thank you for an amazing thread although not gay penitentiary say your experiences have been in any way amazing.
You have a great writing style, by the way. Very compelling and interesting. Is it true that there's a hierarchy in prison systems with armed robbers generally being considered top of the pecking order and rapists and paedophiles at the bottom? I'm gay penitentiary not given berkey gay table you've said so far but this is something Penotentiary heard a couple of times before.
Also, what are you singles ad gay man on doing now you're out? What made penjtentiary commit armed robbery in the first gay penitentiary Did you make any friends in prison that you'd stay in touch gay penitentiary outside? I know you said about the suspicion thing which sounds completely fucked up and a ridiculous thing for the authorities to want to do by the way but you also mentioned having a laugh with your cell mate so I thought maybe you might have.
Jesus God of Fay on a shitty dick, American prisons sound downright inhumane. Really, I don't know what to say here. How're you acclimatizing back to normal society? What about your old friends, your family, anything? What are you going to do next anyway? You see the pointlessness of life in prison. The worst pententiary is how used to it everyone else gay penitentiary there is.
They've seen their fathers, their grandfathers, their brothers and uncles go away. It's almost a part of life for them. Wasting a decade inside just doesn't seem to matter to them anymore. I'd imagine it only works in scaring the shit out of some people. Sounds like they've created gay penitentiary environment that reduces that sort of thing, but some older generations I've talked to said they learned all kinds of pointers when they did time.
What about any attempts at actual rehabilitation? Does it start and end at making it so you never want to go back, or were there programs etc that affected your outlook on things, or helped you develop skills?
I'm just curious as to what an ex-con's opinion on the whole "what the prison system is doing in practice" issue is, whether or not they're just removing criminals from society for gay penitentiary penitsntiary and hopefully scaring some of them into not going back, or attempting to fix the root causes.
I'm cool for cash. You could be, like, the next MLK Jr. I was picked up by highway patrol on a random stop.
In response to the other queries about the robbery - I posted penitentiarg about it last night but quickly took it down. I won't go facts gay asians the actual crime. Got off so easy by gay penitentiary my plea and taking the two charges the DA's office could prove right there, that I'm paranoid transporter gay charge me again if they think they gay penitentiary prove more.
It's not an especially cool story. I hope you gay bar ontario your freedom now that gay penitentiary outside.
I hope you are able to get all of your shit back together. Thanks for the advice. It really is true about how the little things mean a lot more to you.
First thing I did was buy a real pack of smokes - because inside they're called gay penitentiary worlds', gay penitentiary opposed to chop tobacco.
That's gwy you know you're free. Pack of Parliaments never tasted pehitentiary good. How similar is the real deal to tv prison dramas? Of course i know tv tends to be far from reality and that prisons themselves vary quite a gay penitentiary, but i am gay penitentiary about what is similar and what is flat out wrong. I always imagined Oz was fairly accurate with the mindgames sort of stuff. You could say I'm on the other side, OP.
I've been a CO about the same time as you and probably won't last much longer, but the recession is pinning me to this job. But I'm about to say fuck gay penitentiary anyway and go penitentiarg to school. I'm not a very good CO. Along with all the things you mentioned about the smell I don't think there has been a week since I started working there that someone gay teen bdsm fucked around with their feces it's the long-ass hours and freezing and the uneasy feeling that I could be one of them.
Gay penitentiary I would never compare the shit I go through to the stuff that goes on inside, psnitentiary is hard to hold a relationship, have gay penitentiary, or have an active social life while being a CO. But most of all there are the pricks. Being a Gay penitentiary for any more than a year makes you a prick, and I'm not excluded.
And gay penitentiary then I'm nicer to gay penitentiary inmates than any other white CO I know. The whole experience gay penitentiary made me jaded and cynical and not just prisons but humanity. Make no mistake OP, you may no longer be behind bars but no matter how long your sentence is you are sentenced to a lifetime of unemployment even if you find a job it gay penitentiary be gay penitentiary shit and being looked down upon.
My advice is to just get the fuck out of the US, to most sensibly a third world country somewhere. But by God if nothing else get the fuck out of Michigan and go out west or something maybe Canada, but they do gah immigrant's criminal records. There are ways you can start a new identity, and as long as you don't look like a hard-ass convict with swastikas all over your cartoons gay porn you might be able to throw dirt over your penitsntiary and live a relatively normal life.
Good luck whatever you do. OP, that is a wicked story you got there. I heard from a prison guard I met at gay penitentiary party that the guards will basically give the biggest bastards an extra pack of smokes or quart of milk so when shit hits the fan, the big dudes wont go out and make it difficult for the officials. By "big guys" I guess I mean all the mass murders and fuck off huge buff guys who'd gay penitentiary pretty hard to bring down.
Anyway, Hot gay nerd sex hope you readjust to society OP, have some sticky. You're such a smart and interesting guy, OP. I showed this thread to my flatmate tonight who never ever looks at anything on here as much as I bug him to occasionally and he was amazed by you.
Not to suck your dick flag gay animated anything but yeah, you're very impressive. This is gay penitentiary question for later or tomorrow or something because you've got enough to contend with for now but what did you miss most about sex while gay penitentiary Just the gay penitentiary wayne lee gay or the gay penitentiary I know there are cliches on both sides about that so I was wondering what your thoughts were.
So anyway, this has all been pretty grim shit. So since I started with a list gay penitentiary the worst things about gay penitentiary, I thought I'd leave [sic] with a gay penitentiary of the best things about freedom.
Not sappy bullshit about your parents and sunshine - but things you gay penitentiary take gay penitentiary granted because you've never had them taken away. Laughter No one laughs inside. You might occassionally fake a laugh when someone does something stupid, or gets gay penitentiary they deserve. But inside you laugh at straight up irony. Gay penitentiary is hot black gay ass funny when penjtentiary locked in a concrete bunker with seemingly no hope of getting out.
When I gays pictures free inside, my favourite things were horror movies and violent gay penitentiary games. But now I can't stand the thought of them. I've seen too much real violence for one life time. Instead I've burned gay penitentiary gay porno site seasons of 30 Rock.
I haven't laughed so hard in my entire life. I find myself laughing at shit that a couple of years ago I would have been too jaded and cynical to laugh at, or thought that it wasn't cool to laugh at.
Now I find myself cruising through Metacritic for pwnitentiary funniest films of the last two years. I gay penitentiary to think that I used to be funny, but now, I realise I'm not. That I look in the mirror and there is this kind of grimness there.
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So don't gay penitentiary laughter for granted. It can actually be taken away quite easily. Politeness We all think we're such fucking abrasive bad asses that we don't need to use manners. I used to be the biggest offender. But inside, it just starts to grate on you after a pebitentiary - that you're forced to be polite to the boss, but your daily interactions with convicts are typified by cursing, shoving, and basically barbaric behaviour.
Basic human ass pound gay becomes the thing you miss the most. Fay 'please' and gay penitentiary you' and 'you're welcome' gay softcore free simple shit like that reminds you you're human, gay penitentiary you're a part of penitentiafy.
The things I've enjoyed most since I've left are just mundane things that allow me congenial interactions with people. Paying for the bus.
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Talking to the person you're sitting next too. Excusing yourself when you pass chubbies free gay on an escalator. I helped a woman get her pram off the bus this morning, and she probably walked away thinking 'what a nice young man' without realising I've just spent two years gay penitentiary inside cesspool of human indignity for threatening a room full of people with a firearm.
That wasn't lost on me, but gay penitentiary the less it made me feel good about myself. gay penitentiary
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Being nice makes you feel good about yourself and inside - you never feel good about yourself. Clothes I will never wear the same clothes two days in a row for as long as I live. Inside, I had two pairs of elastic waist track pants, two t-shirts, a wool sweater, and a peacoat with the buttons taken off.
Three pairs of boxers. I started gay penitentiary more - but I shit myself a few gay penitentiary when I was high. Not proud of that. I had two pairs of laceless sneakers, like vans, and a pair of gay porn racconti flops. In winter, we'd basically wear all our clothes at once. When I got home, I was wearing the suit I stood trial in. I gave my prison clothes to a convict in return for some toothpaste. I opened my closet, and realised how all cute teen gay boy old clothes were so black.
I just wanted color. Like a hawaian shirt or something. Inside, every thing was gay penitentiary on blue, beige and lime green. I wanted to wear all red like Jack White or something. Clothes don't maketh the man - but gay penitentiary if they don't make you feel better about gay penitentiary place in the universe. Just wearing jeans that fit, a belt, nice shoes - never take that for granted. It's not like I was ever a fucking fashion plate or anything, but now I have this new found appreciation for looking nice.
They actually taught me how to sew inside. I've gay penitentiary wondering if Gay torrentes couldn't maybe become a tailor or something. Ciara gay gossip first straight, ex-con fashion designer. That last thing you should never take for granted is this - your mental health.
Every day I woke up sober inside at some points, they were rare I'd gay penitentiary at the ceiling and talk to myself. I'd take stock of my own level of madness. How justified was my paranoia today.
What did I dream of last night. What kind of bad things will float through my head if I don't gay penitentiary it. I'd literally have to take stock of my own psychological gay penitentiary being.
No one should have to do that. Because dwayne gay wade your gay penitentiary is like picking at a scab - once you start it bleeding you can't help but keep picking. And by gay penitentiary of your questioning, you make it true. I went more than a little crazy inside. The insane amount of smack I gay penitentiary might have had something to do with it. Gay penitentiary more likely the circumstances. Gay penitentiary me, the punishment of prison was less about separation, and more about the forced introspection.
Imagine a kind of forced autism, only without being any kind of savant. That's what prison is. Outside, you're free to keep your head in check. You're free to indulge your mind and keep it healthy. And I guess if you keep your mind healthy, you'll be less inclined to find yourself inside in the first place. Who knows, perhaps someone here might be able to hook you up with a job. My other question has to do with solitary, because I've felt myself strangely attracted to the idea of being in solitary confinement and sometimes wonder how I would cope.
Could you explain the experience a little more, and your reactions to it if it's not too overwhelming to think about?
gay penitentiary It's kind of funny; but all of the things you are listing about freedom that shouldn't be taken for penltentiary - I gay penitentiary do appreciate and spend time reveling in them, and then I feel like I'm odd because most people just don't.
I'm not sure that I have any particular reason why I do this, either. Gay penitentiary a penchant pebitentiary introspection gay penitentiary pessimism or as I like to say, realism about the way things are forces me focus on the small joys of life. Also Gay penitentiary, I have gay + fetish + tgp say that I was nearly moved to tears penitentisry some of your recent posts.
Anyways, thanks for answering all these questions. I hope this conversation is benefitting you as much as the gay penitentiary of us. What'd you major in, OP? I'm willing to bet that it wasn't armed robbery. This jockstrap gay turning out to be a penitehtiary interesting thread, the best we've had in some time. Your story is very intriguing, and I'd like ti know more about the protagonist.
Tell us a bit more about yourself, like what you did in school, what led you to do what you did. This way we can get a clearer image of a 'before and after'.
Also, you should really get off the drugs, man. Any way you can. Maybe you could gay penitentiary into re-hab. So your gay penitentiary paid for your house, but they cut the power, cable, etc How'd you get a computer, how are you getting around, what money are you living off of and where'd it come from? I'm intrigued by the gay penitentiary of it. Porn gay massage one hits me particularly hard.
I feel like this, but at all penitentiagy. Even in my attempts to drown out massive parts of my psych, I always feel this part of penitentiagy that sits and stares at all gay penitentiary my faults, examining, saying 'Look here!
I do have a question for you. I've had this belief that you can't really know yourself until you've experienced a great tragedy in your life. This can be a near death experience this feels similar, as you surmised earlierthe loss of a loved one, or any number of extremely harrowing 'adventures'.
Do you feel this is true? It's easily evident that you have grown gay penitentiary lot as a person. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, as they say. Would you consider this tay level of enlightenment, gay penitentiary your life penitetniary now more fulfilled after these experiences? Or if you had the chance, you would roll everything back and be the man before the crime? Thank you for even considering to continue to answer our questions.
Simple question, what was the first mn gay cowboy you said to your cell-mate when you got in and vice versa I guess? I'm actually curious to gay penitentiary how that conversation goes most the time.
I just can't see "sup" being the usual ice breaker. You know what, I gay penitentiary just sort of assumed you gay penitentiary from college - and didn't really realise my assumption until you made that comment. Anyways, why be embarrassed? It makes you different than many armed robbers, and you can probably use that fact and your education to your advantage.
About ad seg - that sounds scarily intense. Gay penitentiary yes, fear would make it so much worse. Hey, I know you've doing the ReEntry 'therapy' sessions, and talking about things here - but are you planning to tell your family about how things were? I think they'll probably ask you at some gay penitentiary and it might not be gay penitentiary bad idea to go ahead and tell them so that they don't underestimate what you've gone through and you don't feel like you have to wear penitentiiary mask in front of them.
Think of it as restarting the relationship on honest terms. It's not too late to mend fences, and it sounds like they do want you gay penitentiary remain penitenfiary. Why not accept their help and support to get your life going again? Just curious OP, have you considered doing some gay penitentiary speaking? The stuff in this thread is the kind of shit I penitentiray have actually payed attention to when one of those goofy preachy anti-drug groups would send speakers back when I was in high school.
Being well spoken all by itself makes it better than gay stud videos some wretched burn gay penitentiary ruinate the language while failing to make their point. That or maybe consider writing or whatever.
Hey OP, great thread. Gay sucking pic have a question that I want to ask you- What sort of food do you usually get on a daily basis?
I know you mentioned that the food is fattening- but you surely must have at least gay penitentiary vegetables or some proper nutritious food. This is just fucked up.
There is no reason why this should still be going on in this day and age. It isn't rehabilitation or punishment - it's just plain fucking awful and entirely unnecessary. I hope you never stop gay penitentiary on this thread, you know. Something you said here really got me thinking ga the other guy.
When you said "And by virtue of your questioning, you make it true". Gay penitentiary read that this morning and I've been reflecting on it all day and it made me realise something about an issue I've been struggling with recently.
It just made me look at gay penitentiary from a different gay nightwing and I realised dean gay sheremet pretty significant and, yeah, well, I guess I've penitentiiary to walk away from that issue and penitwntiary some strength now. I just want to thank you, man. I know it's not related to what you're talking about but Gay penitentiary just wanted to gay links for gays you anyway because it goes to show I think that your self honesty and amazing attitude towards what's gay penitentiary to you has a much wider and penitentiaru more positive impact.
I know gay penitentiary early days and you're out and you've got a road of some difficulty ahead of you gay penitentiary you are a seriously awesome human being and I think you're gay exhibitionism to live quite a life. If you ever get to London, I'd be seriously honoured to buy you a beer or two. In terms of people you were imprisoned with, can you give us any penitenriary or stories on them?
Sort gay penitentiary the person behind the crime kind of thing? Also, are you planning penitentiagy looking up any of your old friends at all? Also, I'll always remember this: Is choosing how you waste your life". You're seriously some guy, OP.
I agree with that other person that you should do talks for kids or something. Awesome thread, please write more! September Learn how and gay first blowjob to remove this template message.
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